


Is This It?

by sweetsheetsweat



Category: GOT7
Genre: Aging, Angst, Domestic Bliss, Established Relationship, Falling In Love, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, M/M, There's A Tag For That, Underwater Blow Jobs, persistent!jackson, tsundere!jaebum
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-16 18:30:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10577055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetsheetsweat/pseuds/sweetsheetsweat
Summary: Jaebum and Jackson fall into lust and love but keep getting interrupted. Still, they just can't stop.





	

Jackson’s been fucking Jaebum on and off for years.

They got into it quick and easy, with Jaebum acting aloof while Jackson yammered on about being nervous and inexperienced and very interested. That was back when Jackson was less of a slut, was less jaded and secretive about his life away from the cameras. Jaebum has a whole army of defenses around him because he was once labeled by his looks instead of his talents. He's been too pretty to be taken seriously and too serious to be approached. He’s got all these layers and Jackson keeps looking, transfixed, as his life becomes part of Jaebum’s, held tight within Jaebum’s high walls.

To begin with, Jackson almost has no walls. He’s down for things—a lot of things—and he always will be. He’s mischievous and caring and a friend of his once asked why he’d got caught up with Jaebum, who was just a ‘regular asshole’. Jackson had smiled and said, “He’s a pretty cool guy, you know?” and his friend rolled his eyes saying, “he’s got a stick shoved up his ass, being how uptight he is.” Jackson made a face and let it go. Jaebum’s just a nervous person. He played hard to get and fought off any advances, whether unwanted or not. Jackson was in that ass within a few months. 

Jackson and Jaebum get things rolling and the sex is explosive because they fit right (Jaebum occasionally says “get your fucking clown feet out of my ass crack”) and they give each other all they’ve got. Bruises, teeth marks, scratches. Everything’s all hidden under buttoned-up shirts and slick jackets. Jackson slowly becomes more polished like Jaebum, buying nicer jeans that were worn and torn before he even got them onto his body. He buys snapbacks because Jaebum likes them on him, and talks a lot with his hands to tease Jaebum into using them later. Jaebum likes it all, and he still makes fun of Jackson. It’s just what they do.

They get drunk together a lot. At parties, they sometimes come together but they almost always leave together. At first their excuse was that Jaebum had to get Jackson home, because it was only polite after giving him the last shot that left him puking into a stranger’s toilet. Next, Jackson had to say “let’s get home,” while dragging Jaebum into their dorm by his belt loop. After they tire of that, Jaebum and Jackson walk out together, less fucked up and more coherent. They don’t say much these times, because after a while people catch on. They always end up together.

During breaks from shooting or between shallow, barely there relationships, they fuck so hard it’s like a race. Jaebum’s got his hand on Jackson’s throat, biting around his chest, making him spurt cum on new sheets. Jackson pins Jaebum down, large and heavy while Jaebum squirms underneath, breathing fast with his pupils black ringed with deep brown. Their bodies fit together too well—pound for pound, inch for inch. It was never a question of ‘if’, it was a question of ‘when’.

 

...

 

There are a few months when they each try to date someone else, either because they’re fighting, or just not around each other enough. Jaebum gets restless and has plenty of offers to sift through before he finds someone that he deems decent enough to spend some time with. Jackson likes being affectionate and active and meets people when he’s on a show or hanging around at industry parties. There are a lot of people swirling around them. 

Jackson usually calls first, casual and cheerful, giving Jaebum the highlights of his day (“seriously, it was awesome, she was rollerblading and helping people on the crosswalk and she said she was dancing to Cindy Lauper, then the cops came ‘round and tried to arrest her on foot but she’s rollerblading all over the place, circling cops while singing at the tops of her lungs”) and Jaebum listens. He laughs throatily, and questions Jackson about it, finding holes in his story in order to make fun of him. 

They’re like brothers, and lovers, who are best friends who fuck and roommates who never move out. They are all of those things, with no space in between. No part of them can be extracted from the other. 

During those months, Jaebum comes over and creeps into Jackson’s bed, making lewd comments about who was there before him, while Jackson insists that he washes his sheets to an obsessive degree. “Why’d you have to do that?” Jaebum asks. “Is business really that good?” and then Jackson will wrestle him down, mouthing Jaebum’s jaw. He looks him in the eye and smirks, “I’m still the best you’ve ever had, sweetheart,” and Jaebum groans. 

They talk about it later, when the sheets are pushed off the bed and the cum is drying on their bodies. “You think we should feel guilty?” Jackson asks, motioning to his unmade bed. Jaebum shifts, sighs and considers the situation. “Maybe we should tell them,” he says, and in a week, Jackson and Jaebum are single again.

They say “I love you,” a lot, but it can come with a clap on the back, or a quick hug. It’s been said in replacement of a ‘hello’ or a ‘goodbye’. It’s been said so many times before. They get older and bolder, and say everything louder. They say I Love You with sneakily placed rings, with shared responsibilities, with short moments and time away from their lives. Jackson says it when he brings coffee in the morning and lets Jaebum sleep in. Jaebum says it when he’s sweating and pretending that he knows how to fix Jackson’s dented speakers. They say it, and they mean it, and those words live and breathe, and they can’t be taken back.

 

...

 

Some months, they barely have sex at all. They touch each other’s napes and bellies without moving further south. Those months, Jackson thinks, are when they’re trying to figure out how they can fit each other—and whatever this thing is—in their lives. Those months are contemplative, like the quiet hush of a cloudy day in the city. 

Jackson will see Jaebum frowning with a cup of coffee, feet bare and sitting outside, looking onto busy city streets. Jackson will dimple at the fond memories, but he has the aching feeling of wondering if someone will get hurt, or if they can keep any of this up. Labelling some relationships can be helpful; borders and boundaries can keep everything neater and more focused. Feelings, memories, ties that bind. Everything with them is a cycle, like a tide that comes in and out like clockwork. They both feel very tired.

He sees Jaebum when his skin looks paper thin, like it’s stretched across his bones with his moles dotted on top of his eyelid as an afterthought. He’s seen Jaebum when he’s red-eyed and bleary, completely shaken by misery or grief. Jaebum’s laughed, cried and spat in his face. Jaebum’s smiled, scowled, and sneered.

Jaebum’s always been there, and he’s grown with Jackson. They’re not the same people they used to be. When moments that are so real happen, they change your dreams. They make you question what you want and what you need. Jackson’s trying to figure this all out. He stares at Jaebum who looks at him expectantly, eyebrows cocked and fingers curled. Jackson just smiles. At least they’ve touched and tasted happiness.

 

…

 

Some months, they have a hard time. Jackson will look at Jaebum and forget why he loves him and Jaebum will walk away with his fists clenched and his mouth flat. He'll disappear into himself for a while, gritting his teeth to tuck in blistering words that he used to carelessly throw around. Jackson always tries to coax Jaebum back into his life, and they fight for a few days but they miss each other because they laugh and fuck harder with each other than with anyone else. Jackson gets loud and Jaebum gets frustrated. He kicks clothes up and slams doors and Jackson walks behind him, demanding answers. Jaebum gets locked up and shuts down, quiet in his anger. Jackson always wishes he said less.

Even when their relationship hangs by a single thread, it’s kind of sick how they can look at each other from across the room and know that they own one another. Jaebum knows that Jackson will open his door for him and smile, eyes crinkling and fond. Jackson elbows Jaebum and they laugh, holding their stomachs and howling. Still, on some days Jackson feels on edge, like another fight will come and it’ll take them both down. He isn’t sure what to do on those days. It doesn’t happen often, and they get awkward and flighty. 

Jaebum will shuffle towards him, shutting Jackson’s door and whispering, “I’m sorry,” while moving towards him. Jackson will frown and feel exhaustion down to his toes and squeeze him into a tight hug. They apologize with long caresses and slow kisses. His tanned skin presses against Jaebum’s winter pale and they breathe together under plain sheets, on his bed that has been empty since Jaebum walked out of his bedroom.

They make up because there’s nothing else to do. No one knows Jackson like Jaebum does. He can’t start all of it again with another person. He’s not sure it would work. He can’t take the risk, and he can’t give it up.

Jaebum has given him the best things he’s ever had—deep feelings, undying support, incomparable memories, long laughs and frantic fucks, understanding—and Jaebum is someone he’d never forget. Jaebum’s someone he doesn’t want to try and forget.

 

...

 

Once, he’d told a close friend that he wasn’t sure that he and Jaebum could make it past their first few months. His friend had said that it was meant to be, that they met under circumstances that were as sure as the earth and the sun. Jackson was silent, and he laughed a little, thinking of Jaebum’s soft and hard parts. He told his friend that he’d ride out everything with Jaebum, slow and easy, like it always was when they sat next to each other with thighs touching and mouths smiling.

Years later, Jackson sees him again. “Hey,” he says to the friend, “I know what you mean about the earth and the sun. We all need something to orbit around, right?”

His friend frowned, distracted, and said, “Yeah, hey, how are you and Jaebum?”

Jackson fingers his hair, long layers streaked with pale blond. “We’re still working on it.”

 

...

 

A year later, they spend time escaping with each other, alone and a long way from practices and long tours. They travel somewhere and Jackson laughs when Jaebum sticks a hat on his head, eyes crossed with cheeks pink and sunburned. Jackson kisses him and rubs his shoulder. Jaebum makes fun of his palm print shirt and asks, “could you be more obnoxious?" 

Jackson rolls his eyes and shoves at him, unbuttoning his shirt. They sit on white sand sometimes, and other years they rub their palms on wet grass in front of a river.

In the shade of deep green trees, Jackson strips down to his shorts and jumps in while Jaebum leers and laughs when water splashes him. Jackson pulls him into the water and he submerges, trying to tug Jaebum’s shorts off of him. He gives Jaebum underwater blowjobs that take ages because he keeps coming up for air. 

“Wish you were a mermaid, I’d get off faster,” Jaebum laughs.

Jackson counters, “you’re still impatient after all of these years? Told you, I’m working on growing gills—shut your mouth while I practice,” and he slips back under. Jaebum moans loud and hard, and the forest hear him.

 

…

 

After a while, they finally get around to talking about their future. They leave the past alone because they can’t change it, but Jaebum likes to bring everything together and references things Jackson’s said. He's serious about lists. Jackson pads into Jaebum’s room and leaves crumbs everywhere, passing Jaebum breakfast. Jaebum’s half asleep, holding his eyes open but they stay half-lidded and close every few seconds. Jackson laughs, opens the window to let fresh air and the warm sun in. Jaebum breathes slow and keeps his plate balanced on his chest.

“Hey,” Jackson says. “You wanna move into my room? It'll be better than last time,” he promises.

Jaebum cracks an eye open and asks, “again?”

Jackson smiles, crumbs on his face. Jaebum rubs his hand on Jackson’s chin. He shrugs his shoulders and says, “alright.”

Slow and easy.

 

…

 

Years later, Jackson pads into their den and Jaebum is sitting with his legs up, glasses low on his nose. Jackson peers over his shoulder and Jaebum’s reading a book about space exploration and Jackson snorts, smirking at Jaebum’s quirks. 

“Hey,” Jaebum says, voice low.

“I’m heading out for a run.” Jackson rubs his palm in Jaebum’s hair, feeling the soft length of it. “You’ve got more grey hairs in the back. Want me to dye it again?”

Jaebum looks up at him, the corners of his eyes surrounded by fine lines. “Might as well leave it. Silver fox, and all that.”

“Ah,” Jackson says, sagely nodding, “You’re giving in. No longer fighting for your youth. Shit, the end is near, I should probably buy your walker right now before the line builds up.”

“I think you’re the cause of 90% of all of my grey hair.”

Jackson sucks his teeth. “Got in there before your genes failed you, huh?”

“Inevitable,” Jaebum says. “You’re a pain in my ass.”

“Not yet,” Jackson promises, hitching his rain jacket on. “But maybe later tonight, sweetheart.”

Jaebum grabs his ass on his way out. Jackson pushes Jaebum's hand away, laughing while winking.

 

…

 

One year later, he watches as Jaebum sits on the cold beach in front of their house. He’s watching sea gulls and burying his feet and hands in the sand. His hair whips around in the wind, short on the sides with varying shades of grey flashing in the sun. Jaebum’s shoulders are hunched over and there’s some softness around and above his hips. His neck is still strong and his cheekbones are still sharp. Both everything and nothing has changed.

Jackson walks out, wearing flip flops and a light sweater. He brings one for Jaebum, who’s always forgetful, and covers him under it. Jaebum looks up and smiles, pale face handsome under lazy sunlight. His eyes crinkle deeply at their sides and his twin moles above his eyelids are moving into each other as age slackens his skin. Jackson remembers the way Jaebum used to cut through him with those eyes, and the way he would rake them down Jackson's naked body, eyes rapt with lust. Jackson puts his hands onto Jaebum's shoulder, bringing the two of them closer, and he smiles softly.

“Nice day, huh?” Jaebum says, rubbing a hand on Jackson’s ankle.

“Could be warmer,” Jackson says, smiling wide. “But I ain’t complaining.”

 

…

 

Jaebum languidly lays on their sheets, spreading out and crooning Jackson's name. He's chuckling and his face is open and happy. Jackson loves seeing him like this. He's so much more pliant and gentle; the years have filed down his edges and they fit together with no seam in between.

Jackson feels himself being pulled down towards the earth. He was always daydreaming when he was younger, but Jaebum taught him to sink his teeth into what he wanted and Jackson always kept that tucked away. He never gave up on the two of them, regardless of how much sleep he lost or how little he had to clutch onto.

"Are you just gonna stare at me? I'm waiting." Jaebum demands, and Jackson snorts. He hasn't lost much of his impatience.

Jackson smirks, straddling him and leading down for a deep kiss. Jaebum is hungry for it and doesn't let him go until he's out of air and panting harshly. Jaebum watches him with devious eyes and a mischievous smile. Jackson smiles at him widely, recognizing the young boy that grew into a man. He catches glimpses every now and then, and everything comes full circle. Jackson’s loved so many versions of him, and he's only getting better.

"You're aging like a fine wine," Jackson says, trying to hold in his laughter. Jaebum scowls, hooking his leg around Jackson's ankle, and flipping them over smoothly. His greying hair hangs around his face and he pushes it off while licking his lips. He tilts up Jackson's chin and smiles widely, meeting his eyes.

"Drink up then," he says, and Jackson opens wide. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first post on here, so hey! 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed~
> 
> Edit: Newborn baby tumblr [here](https://sweetsheetsweat.tumblr.com).


End file.
